


if you wanna be my lover you gotta get with my friends

by matsuokarins



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Really Really Dumb, lowkey all about oinoya interactions, lowkey not about the poor quality alright
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-31
Updated: 2015-08-31
Packaged: 2018-04-18 06:43:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4696052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/matsuokarins/pseuds/matsuokarins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>in which Kageyama deeply regrets inviting Oikawa out for ice cream with his teammates. until he doesn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	if you wanna be my lover you gotta get with my friends

**Author's Note:**

> aka an extremely pointless, poorly written piece of oikage fluff to make myself feel better

Kageyama still sometimes did a double take waking up next to Oikawa Tooru. Of all the people he could have ended up with, Oikawa was certainly the last boy Kageyama ever expected. He’d admired Oikawa in middle school, but from a distance and he had to admit that the admiration turned to resentment upon Oikawa’s treatment of him.

He had never _hated_ Oikawa per se, had always respected him, but he’d thought of him as a rival at best and an annoying, unpleasant presence at worst. Certainly not boyfriend material.

Not that Kageyama had even thought about what qualified as “boyfriend material”. He had only thought about volleyball and what kind of juice to buy at the vending machine. He still mostly thought about volleyball and had many a vending machine existential crisis, but now somehow Oikawa featured into his life as a boyfriend (although arguably still an annoying presence).

“Good morning, Tobio-chan,” Oikawa mumbled, rolling over to face Kageyama as if he could sense his stare.

“Morning,” Kageyama answered lazily.

“So blunt,” Oikawa sighed, closing his eyes and snuggling back into the pillow.“Is this all I get when I invite you to stay over?”

“What do you want me to do? Make you breakfast in bed and suck your dick while I’m at it?” Kageyama asked sarcastically, laying back and slipping his arm around Oikawa. Oikawa always managed to bring out the best and worst in him. On the one hand, he sometimes successfully held conversations with good social skills when Oikawa was around, but on the other, he turned into a sarcastic jerk around Oikawa as well.

“Tobio-chan,” Oikawa sat up, grinning. “If you made me breakfast in bed, _I_ would suck _your_ dick.”

“Hmmph,” Kageyama grumbled, turning away from his boyfriend. “I’ll pass.”

“Ouch,” Oikawa shook his head, wincing. “My heart.” He gripped his chest and sighed loudly. “You have no empathy, do you?”

“Not for you,” Kageyama responded, smiling. A few months ago, he wouldn’t have let Oikawa see how he enjoyed their teasing, but he was getting better with sharing his emotions.

After all, relationships were a two-way street. He had to reciprocate Oikawa’s carelessly flung around emotions and effort, or the relationship would go nowhere. Or, so Hinata had explained -- very patiently -- one day after practice after Kageyama expressed confusion about why Oikawa was upset with him one day.

It wasn’t that Kageyama was clueless to social cues. He got it -- he thought -- but acting upon it seemed against his instincts.

“Love you, too,” Oikawa pushed himself out of bed and walked off towards the kitchen. Kageyama smelled coffee in the air and heard Oikawa padding back into the bedroom after about fifteen minutes.

“Here,” Oikawa handed him a purple mug decorated with a corny “Number 1 Setter” -- Kageyama assumed this was actually supposed to be referring to Oikawa, but he supposed it was appropriate either way -- and kissed the top of his head, sitting back down next to him.

“So, Tobio, what would you like to do after school today?” Oikawa asked.

Kageyama took a sip of his coffee -- did Oikawa put some sort of chocolate flavoring in this? Did people actually take their daily coffee so sweet? -- and shrugged. “I have practice. You have practice. Doesn’t matter.”

Oikawa pouted. “But it’s Friday.”

“And?”

“Come on Tobio, I want to go out.”

“Well…” Kageyama started. “My team usually goes out for ice cream after practice on Fridays. You could come?”

Kageyama was still unsure at what stage his relationship with Oikawa was. A few months ago, after Karasuno’s painful loss to Seijou Oikawa had cornered Kageyama in the supplies closet as Kageyama helped to put away the balls for the day. He’d claimed that Kageyama had performed surprisingly well in their match and that Oikawa liked to reward such prowess in his competition. Thus followed an unexpected blowjob from Oikawa, who then left promising Kageyama that he would call him to return the favor at some point.

That “some point” ended up being later in the tournament. Kageyama had felt compelled to follow through and had ended up not only going back for a day but also spending the night in Oikawa's hotel room. As a result, Kageyama had spent plenty of time with Oikawa’s Seijou teammates -- including Kindaichi, much to his initial dismay. And he hung out with Iwaizumi, Oikawa’s best friend, often. But Oikawa still had yet to spend time with Kageyama’s teammates -- even his best friend, Hinata -- apart from competition. It didn’t help that Karasuno hated the ground that Oikawa walked on, but Kageyama was still unsure if he was far enough along in his relationship to ask Oikawa to spend time with his less-than-hospitable friends.

“Really? Would they want me there?” Oikawa’s voice was guarded and his thumbs worried the rim of his coffee mug. Oikawa elicited glares from the majority of the Karasuno boys -- although mostly Noya and Tanaka -- when he so much as picked Kageyama up from practice.

“I want you there,” Kageyama avoided the question. “Please? And y’know what they say..”

“What do they say?” Oikawa asked, grinning now.

“If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends,” Kageyama replied, staring at Oikawa seriously.

Oikawa giggled uncontrollably, nearly snorting coffee out of his nose. “That’s a song, Tobio.” He hiccuped and broke into a second fit of giggles. Kageyama cursed himself internally. He knew he’d heard the phrase somewhere, but he thought it had been Hinata on the phone with Kenma, not the radio. “But..” Oikawa hiccuped again, “I would be honored to get ice cream with you and your team. I’ll pick you up after practice.”

                                                                                           _____________________________________

Kageyama realized he had picked a bad day to invite Oikawa for ice cream about halfway through practice. Tanaka was upset about being rejected by a girl from school earlier in the day, Daichi and Suga were fighting, Tsukishima “accidentally” hit Hinata in the face with the volleyball five times, and by the end of practice Ennoshita looked like he was seriously contemplating shooting everyone in the gym. Kageyama knew from experience that the only thing that could be more annoying than a dispirited, frustrating practice was Oikawa Tooru. Unfortunately, as the minutes evaporated and the sky darkened, Kageyama didn’t have time to call Oikawa and cancel their plans.

“Tobio-chan! Second-rate volleyball club! How are you all tonight? Where are we going for ice cream? I’m feeling strawberry, but I could easily go for chocolate.” Oikawa babbled, waving in the rage-inducing way he thought was cute. Kageyama gritted his teeth and flashed a guilty look to his team, all of whom were staring at Oikawa completely dumbfounded.

“How was practice, Tobio-chan?” Oikawa asked Kageyama directly, walking into the gym to kiss Kageyama and -- rather unceremoniously -- slap his ass.

“Not great,” Kageyama hissed, trying to warn Oikawa to cool it.

“Oikawa-san!” Hinata finally broke the awkward silence of the slightly infuriated, partially incredulous, and mostly annoyed team. “So you’re Kags’s boyfriend, eh? None of us ever thought he could get a boyfriend who’s so cool!”

“I don’t remember ever calling _him_ cool,” Tanaka grumbled, glaring at Oikawa.

“We’ve heard a lot about you. Besides what we saw in our matches, and on TV of course,” Suga finally said, ever the uncomfortable diplomat.

“Oh have you? Do you talk about me, Tobio?” Oikawa ruffled Kageyama’s hair in what was probably supposed to be fond gesture.

“No, never,” Kageyama rolled his eyes. Tsukishima snickered from across the room, mouthing ‘All the time.’

“Yeah, he does,” Nishinoya said, walking up to Oikawa, arms crossed firmly. The tip of his gelled hair only reached Oikawa’s chest. “And you know what I’ve heard? I’ve heard you give the best blowjobs in Japan. I disagree.”

“Oh really? You’ve heard that?” Oikawa glanced over at Kageyama, eyes dancing, a damn near malicious grin spreading across his face.

“He didn’t hear that from me!” Kageyama insisted, his face flushing beet red. He could not believe this. Of anything anyone could have said to Oikawa, of anything that could have happened, it had to be this. They had to hit a subject of immense pride.  

“I assure you, it’s true,” Oikawa told Nishinoya, never taking his eyes off of Kageyama.

“I don’t think so. I’d like to challenge this reputation you’ve got,” Noya argued. “I like to think I give the best blowjobs in Japan.”

“Oh, really?” Oikawa purred, staring down at Nishinoya as if he were a naive child. Kageyama always got that look in matches -- the majority of Oikawa’s opponents probably did -- and it made him insane.

“Yup.” Nishinoya, for his part, did not let Oikawa’s subtle intimidation faze him.

“Well, I suppose there’s only one way to find out,” Oikawa grinned and walked over to Asahi. Kageyama could feel in his gut the rest of the team’s collective intake of breath. Kageyama wanted to kill something -- preferably Oikawa. He hadn’t imagined this could get possibly get any worse but Oikawa just had to prove him wrong.

“Azumane-san.” Oikawa grinned, grabbing Asahi’s waist and running one hand through his hair teasingly. “Come with me and we can settle this once and for all.”

“I...I, um.” Asahi was beet-red, stammering and attempting to politely wriggle out of Oikawa’s grasp. Kageyama waited with bated breath as Nishinoya, looking like rage personified, marched over to rescue his blushing boyfriend.

“Get your hands off of him.” Nishinoya’s voice was low, calm, and somehow even more terrifying than his normal over-the-top personality. Nishinoya pulled Oikawa away from Asahi roughly. “Sorry, sorry,” Oikawa laughed, holding his hands up with a shit-eating grin that evinced absolutely-not-sorry-at-all.

“But you were the one who challenged me.”

Nishinoya glared, his arm wrapped possessively around Asahi’s waist. Kageyama should have told Oikawa the unspoken rules of Karasuno -- one of them being that you do not seriously fuck with Asahi unless you a) are Nishinoya Yuu or b) want to incur Nishinoya Yuu’s wrath.

“How would you feel if I sucked off Kageyama, huh? Or your precious Iwaizumi?” Nishinoya looked as if he might spit in his fury.

“Hey, go for it,” Oikawa grinned. “I suppose that’s another way to find out. I was trying to give you an advantage by picking someone biased towards you but okay, if you want to ensure your doom.”

“How about you go-” Nishinoya began to yell, back to his obstreperous self once it was honor, and not his boyfriend at stake.

“Okay, okay.” Daichi finally interjected. “It’s clear we don’t all get along but-”

“Hey, I’m trying,” Oikawa interrupted. Kageyama looked around the gym for an appropriate place to shrivel up and die. Did Oikawa have social skills? Did he understand how to read a room? Or did he just like to do all the wrong things on purpose?

“Oh, so it’s me?” Nishinoya asked, firing up yet again.

“No, no.” Oikawa finally said. “I’m sorry.” Kageyama heard himself audibly gasp.

“Jesus, Tobio-chan.” Oikawa glared at him balefully. “I can’t be sorry for anything?”

“Well you _can_ ,” Kageyama spluttered. “But you never _are_.”

“Hmmph.” Oikawa turned back to the group. “Tobio told me if I want to date him seriously I have to make nice with his friends. I thought that only meant shrimpy over here, but I guess that means all of you.”

“No, you don’t need to be nice to Tsukishima,” Kageyama clarified, getting a small, sarcastic laugh from Tsukki.

“Alright. Tyrannosaurus Rex, don’t expect anything from me.” Tsukki looked somewhat affronted by this, but both Nishinoya and Tanaka emitted short, surprised laughs. “Anyways, I’m sorry for causing problems. I only mean to be nice enough to impress Tobio and make fun of all of you in a good-natured way-”

“Oddly specific,” Ennoshita muttered under his breath to Suga.

“And so let me buy all of you ice-cream.” Oikawa finished, very begrudgingly.

“Yes!” Hinata yelled, breaking the slightly hesitant awkward silence. “I'm definitely down to get the most expensive thing there; what d'you think? Let’s go, Nishinoya!” Hinata directed his attention to the nearest person, grabbing his hand and practically yanking him out the door of the gym. The rest of the team followed -- much more calmly -- after them. Kageyama walked out last, hand in hand with Oikawa.

“How was that?” Oikawa asked Kageyama, playing with his fingers. “That wasn’t too awful was it?”

Kageyama smiled at Oikawa, who looked uncharacteristically nervous. “I’m proud of you. Much better than I expected.”

“Aww, Tobio-chan. How proud are you?” Oikawa laughed, swinging their arms and grinning as if all uneasiness had evaporated. “Proud enough to make me breakfast tomorrow? Proud enough to give me a medal?”

“Don’t push it,” Kageyama said, his slight smile betraying his current inability to actually be annoyed with Oikawa.

“Push it? Me? Never!” Oikawa insisted, making Kageyama laugh. He’d never expected to be hand-in-hand with Oikawa Tooru, laughing at his shitty jokes and feeling immense warmth spreading from his stomach through his entire body simply because of his presence. He’d never expected it, but he wouldn’t have it any other way.


End file.
